Friday, December 2, 2011

Obamonopoly

Hey Mom and Dad, having trouble deciding what to get Junior for Christmas? Well straight from the treasury department and Barack productions comes the board game your whole family will just love! It Obamonopoly. Now instead of lasting hours, Obamonopoly will last days. This educational board game still has Boardwalk and Park Place but now in order to own them you must pay each of the other players $200 with every roll of the dice because we want to teach your kids that the rich must pay their fair share.

Mortgaged your properties, out of cash? No the game isn't over, far from it! Now 'the bank' will refinance or even forgive your debt and give you your property back (paid for by the owners of Park Place and Boardwalk.) Are you stuck with Baltic place? Now each time a player lands on your property you get to charge them another rich tax to help subsidize your unfortunate position in life. Don't feel like rolling? Too much work? It's now okay to use your 'get into jail free' card. All your debts are cancelled and you don't have any responsibility..except to COLLECT $200 each time someone else passes GO! Tired of the unfair roll of the dice? Now you can occupy the Bank and get everything free for 30 turns straight. Yes with Obamonopoly the game won't ever end. You can borrow and unlimited amount of money. What your money ran out? No problem, just print your own using the singly ply roll of toilet paper that is now supplied with the game! Borrow trillions of dollars and the best part is that the other players have to pay higher taxes the more money you borrow!

Land on the Railroads! If you are not in the Union you now must forfeit 30% of your total cash on hand in order to continue to pay for unsustainable pensions given to the railroad workers. Yes your children will learn some valuable lessons this year when they play Obamonopoly!

Sneak Peek for next Christmas:
Don't miss our coming attraction the Game of LIFE. Now you don't need a career, don't need to get married, just play as a girl, have babies and all the male players will fund your trip from point A to Point B. It doesn't matter if they know you or not, we will soak em for everything they've got..

Merry Christmas from Barack and Michelle

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by David W. Andersen